Do you play fantasy football and are you sick of the same old punishment ideas every year? Lets face it, the waffle house challenge, dressing up goofy, and and silly trophies are getting stale. It's time for some new punishment ideas, and I have exactly what you and you league need! Let's get into the 5 new ELITE punishment ideas your league needs!
The Boomerang
G'day mate! A boomerang is famous for going one direction and then turning and going back the opposite direction and in this punishment, the loser is the Boomerang! The loser has to gain and lose 40 pounds by the end of the season or else they're kicked out of the league. You may say "gaining and losing 40 pounds in around 5 months is nearly impossible". To that I respond, that's why it's a punishment. I also want to clarify, this is gaining 40 pounds then losing 40 pounds after. This is not 20/20. The journey along the way will help them see the error in their ways. Also they'll have plenty of time to listen to fantasy football podcasts while on the treadmill!
2. The Movie Star
They might suck at fantasy football but maybe they'll be a star on the silver screen! The loser has to shoot a shot for shot remake of Schindler's List. The loser has to play every character in the film for its entire 3 hours and 15 minute run time. The movie will then be played at the draft party where they will be verbally torn down for yet another terrible performance.
3. The Roll Tide Dream
To avoid spreading the loser gene further, the loser must marry their first cousin and move to Alabama. They MUST live a happy life and have loser children to continue being league cash cows for future generations. If at any point the loser seems to be doing it begrudgingly, then they should be kicked out of the league immediately.
4. You are not the Father
The loser must find their way onto reality TV to argue that a child is not theirs. They must have a same race partner but an opposite race baby. They have to argue heatedly and can bring up anything EXCEPT that the baby is a completely different race. When it is announced that they are not the father, they must run around and go crazy.
5. The Soup Kitchen
The loser must volunteer to work at a soup kitchen. Yeah, ok, it's not that easy. They have to bring a can labeled "TIPS" and harass and berate the homeless as they pass by you in the soup line. They can not accept any money from other volunteers and they can't leave until they get $20 in tips. If they don't reach the $20 in line, then they have to go table to table.
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